30 Days of Beauty-Day 19: Lunch with a Friend

There’s something special about having lunch with a friend.  It may be a commonplace occurrence for many, but it’s worth stopping a moment to think about why we treasure this experience so much.  There is a certain beauty about having a friendship where you can share everyday happenings and feelings.

Every Wednesday, a friend and I try to meet for a late lunch.  I look forward to meeting her each week to catch up on what’s going on in our lives.  I believe that we both value our time together since we change our luncheon dates to other days of the week if we unavoidably can’t get together on a particular Wednesday. 

We never lack for something to talk about.  First, there is a genuine caring for each other.  Second, we have a lot of the same friends and social engagements.   Last, we have a lot of common interests.  These form a stream of never-ending conversation.  We laugh a lot and find a great deal of joy in our friendship.  I am looking forward to our next lunch!

Have you found your joy today?

30 Days of Joy: Day 15-Fridays

TGIF!  I know it really shouldn't matter to me since I am retired, but I am glad that today is Friday.  I still feel the rhythm of the week since my husband works Monday through Friday.  It does get a little confusing in the summer when my younger son works Thursday through Sunday, but I still enjoy Fridays and the promise of the weekend.  When our kids were little, Friday night was always pizza night.  After working all week, I was tired and didn't want to cook another dinner, and everyone loved pizza.  We looked forward to our pizza nights together.  They were a fun way for the family to end the busy week.  However, the reason that I love Friday nights now is because it is date night!

My husband and I have always had a date night since our kids were very little.  We realized that we missed each other and decided to start having a weekly date night.  You know how it is:  you work all week, pick up the kids from daycare, fix dinner, spend time with the kids, put them to bed, do laundry, dishes, etc., fall into bed exhausted, and hardly ever talk to each other!  After 13 years of marriage without kids, we missed our time together to talk, eat a leisurely meal, and just enjoy being together.  So we invented our form of date night.  We didn't have parents around to babysit and couldn't afford to pay for babysitters, so we decided to put the kids to bed a little earlier on Saturday nights, cook dinner together, pour a glass of wine, and eat a leisurely dinner while catching up on our week.  Sometimes we would follow this up with a movie we had rented or listening to music, but the thing I always looked forward to was talking and reconnecting as adults and best friends.

Once our kids got older with their own social lives, my husband and I changed our date night to Fridays and would go out for dinner.  This started when I was very busy with my career and working an incredible number of hours.  I looked forward to this night every week so I could "dump" from the workweek.  (This also meant that my husband only had to listen to me complain about the stresses of work one day a week!)  I was then able to leave work behind and enjoy the weekend with my family.  We would have a glass of wine, eat our dinner, share dessert, and then have coffee-taking hours to enjoy each other's company and talk away from our children.  We continue this practice even now.

We have some favorite spots for dinner.  If the weather is nice, we often go to restaurants with outdoor seating so we can have dinner al fresco.  We have one standby where the staff know us, and we know some of the other Friday night customers.  It is a fun, friendly evening.  At least once each summer, we have dinner at a restaurant on a lake where we can watch the boats arrive at the dock.  Some places we go have outdoor fireplaces or heaters for cooler evenings.  The venue really doesn't matter-what is important is being together. Tonight my husband and I are going to see an early movie followed by dinner.  I can't wait!  After 38 years of marriage, it's good to know that I still look forward to spending time talking with my husband; that time together is still valued and important.

So, in my world TGIF has a special, joyful meaning!  I hope that you are able to develop a meaningful tradition for your Friday nights if you haven't done so already.  No matter which day of the week is your Friday, I think it is important to celebrate the end to the work week and the beginning of the weekend.  If today is your celebration day, enjoy your evening.  Whatever you do, find time to connect with someone who is important to you.  Enjoy!

Have you found your joy today?

30 Days of Joy: Day 5-Encouragement

As I look back on my life thus far, I am struck by all of the help I have had.  Obviously, it started when I was very young when my parents were helping me navigate this wonderful journey called life.  As I moved from Miami to Wisconsin to Minnesota, I encountered some wonderful people who helped me figure out the new culture of each new school I attended.  Then I made the great journey to college.

During the first week of my freshman year, I met someone who ultimately changed my life-my husband.  While I didn't particularly like him at first, I later found that he was my very best friend and my love.  I was very unsure of myself at that time, but he has always believed in me and my ability to accomplish anything I set my mind to.  His encouragement has been an important component in making me who I am today.

While I moved in my career from teacher to mentor to administrator to director, I always had people who helped me along the way.  Without their support and encouragement, I'm not sure that I would have been able to grow and accomplish all that I've done.  Keeping that in mind, I have made sure to encourage others along the way.  I had many student teachers whom I encouraged.  Then when I was an adjunct professor at St. Thomas, I encouraged the teachers I was helping to prepare.  Once I entered Human Resources, a lot of my time was spent in career counseling and encouraging others in seeking their dreams.  In fact, here is my philosophy statement from my professional portfolio taken from a song called 

Encouragement:

Life is beautiful,

And life is good,

But life will never, never be easy

Like we sometimes wish it could.

I believe we were all meant to succeed.

I believe we were all born to win.

You might stand alone at the top of the victory stand

But you get there with the love and support of your friends.

It takes a pat on the back,

It takes a hand to hold,

It takes some words of hope that touch your heart and soul.

It takes encouragement, encouragement.

That fragile bridge between your dreams and accomplishment.

Surround yourself in this human experiment

With those who proudly wear the badge of encouragement.

By Don Wharton

At this time, I know several people who are starting new endeavors or encountering challenges with work or struggling with the day-to-day challenges of life.  I believe that Facebook has been a wonderful tool for many of them to keep them going.  I also believe that it has been a wonderful means to communicate our encouragement and support.  As I have mentioned before, many of the people connecting have never actually met each other.  Many live in different cities or even different countries, but they still show great compassion and encourage one another in life's daily struggles.  This is so powerful!

As you go through your day today, think of those who might need a little encouragement and see if you can bring them a little joy to make their way a bit easier.  You never know!  Your message or picture or response to their need may be just what they need to get through this trial or work through this block to their success.  You may be able to bring some joy to someone else, and you never know!  It may come back to you.

Have you found your joy today?